Don’t Give Up Your Happiness For Others

Life sometimes requires us to give up certain things. And we do this because there are things that make up for it, because this balance is part of what makes us happy.

However, it is not always the case. The balance is not always maintained at that subtle point where everyone wins and no one loses. In love relationships, it often happens that one of the two gives up his happiness for the sake of the other.

It’s not selfish if you don’t want to give up something

It’s not about being selfish or putting one’s own needs above someone else’s. Life requires you to come to an agreement with yourself and everyone else. And both sides are equally important.

You should have enough dignity to feel good about yourself, to be able to look at yourself in the mirror and acknowledge yourself every day and say, “This is me and I’m happy.”

At the same time, when it comes to coexisting with other people, each of us needs reciprocity that makes every effort worthwhile, where every time you give up something, you get something else in its place. Where happiness is shared and absorbed by both parties, not limited.

What makes me happy defines me, so if you take it away from me, I’m no longer myself

Happiness consists of small things and big things. You are happy when you are with the people you love, be it friends, family, partners or pets. You also feel good doing what you love, what defines you, be it a hobby, a job, a habit or a gesture.

At some point, you might leave everything that defines you behind for someone else’s sake. Your family, your friends, your job…

Anything you give up is worth giving up if what you get in return brings you something you hope for. While it is true that nothing in life is certain and it is almost always necessary to take risks, we still need gestures, words, attitudes and actions that show us that everything we have done has been worth it.

We are often aware that life is a struggle, that sometimes we have to give up things in order to find better things and grow. However, there is no justification for leaving behind everything that makes you happy just to make others happy. It makes no sense: from the moment you give up everything that defines you and makes you happy, you give yourself up… What will you offer that other person if you have lost yourself?

The people who deny you your happiness don’t deserve you

The people who make you give up everything that brings you pleasure, joy or convenience don’t deserve you. You are much more than you think; you are not just a physical being, a presence or a voice that breaks the silence.

You are your afternoon walks, your bedtime reading, your unplanned outings all by yourself. You are your mornings at the beach and your coffee with friends. You are your job, your ideals, your movies, your afternoon nap with your dog. What will be left of you when all this is taken from you?

Happiness is not giving up, but gaining

The people who have the least are not always the happiest. No, the happiest are the people with the most affection, peace, balance and love in their hearts. We are not talking about material wealth here, but rather emotional wealth, something that we should develop every day.

Happiness costs nothing, but if you ask me it is one of the most difficult human challenges. Sometimes, without really knowing why, we even make our own lives impossible. Therefore, always keep the following simple things in mind:

• Learn to give and take. Every day is an ongoing exchange in which, through mutual respect and understanding, no one should have to give up anything.

• Understand that it is impossible to make someone else happy if you are not happy yourself.
• Never make the mistake of giving up everything for someone without getting anything in return, because you will be giving yourself away completely. You will be nothing more than a shadow of yourself. And if you lose your identity, you lose everything.
• Listen to yourself every day, understand your needs and understand the needs of others. No one is selfish because he takes care of himself, because he tries to be happy, to grow, to become wiser and more competent, to love himself a little more.

Love is the only force that grows when it is shared and that is something we should never give up…

–Images courtesy of Lisa Falzon–